Tuesday, February 27, 2007

It's too late now, but...

I've been wondering if I shoulda had kids. Or a kid.

There have been times, many times that I was really glad I did not. But now that the years are bumping into me, I have begun to wonder. Again.

This is totally self-indulgent, I know, so please forgive.

In the last year or two, I've actually looked into adopting but dropped it without discussion with anyone, including Susan, as an idea that was probably selfish and desparate to begin with. The topic would come up in a round about way, and in the end decided that if it were to happen, it should have been at least 15 years ago.

I've been told I would have made a good father. Probably. Hopefully. But it's a waste of time and a bit selfish and self-focused to ponder that for too long. Maybe I am writing this to let it go? Hmmm.

Some of my younger friends are having or trying to have babies. I am really happy for them if it happens. It makes my heart sing when I hear of it. "Joy" is a good word.

To their little ones, I'd love to become a surrogate uncle if I could and I'm sure the parents will appreciate an easy mark for a baby sitter now and again. The only downside of allowing me to be a baby sitter is that they will be spoiled beyond reason. Fair warning.

So, young friends, have them babies, okay? There's some Uncle-ing to do!

And forgive an old man if he gets a little weepy around babies.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Put Another Candle on my Birthday Cake!

To all the Sheriff John Deputies out there who are sharing this day with me, let's sing the "Birthday Cake Polka" together.

Birthday Cake Polka

Put another candle on my birthday cake
We're gonna bake a birthday cake
Put another candle on my birthday cake
I'm another year old today

I'm gonna have a party with my birthday cake
Come on and take some birthday cake
Put another candle on my birthday cake
I'm another year old today

We'll have some pie and sandwiches
and chocolate ice cream too
We'll sing and play the day away
and one more thing I'm going to do

I'll blow out the candles on my birthday cake
and when I do, a wish I'll make
Put another candle on my birthday cake
I'm another year old today

(repeat above choruses)

Happy birthday to you
I'm another year old today.

A few years ago, I received a letter from John Rovick, KTTV's Sheriff John and my lunchtime companion when I was a little tyke. The letter was as gentle, kind and warm as I hoped he was when I watched him, constantly in the 1950's and early 60's. After I read it and remembered that time, I felt very, very old. But appreciative. He was especially appreciated when I was a very sick little boy and spent much time under doctor's care or in bed.

It made me think of much simpler times, filled with an innocence that was held in earnest and without embarrassment. I thought of my brother and the days and nights we shared in those days. Truly, those days were and remain a blessing beyond description. He is and was a great brother and I love him dearly. One of the best birthday presents I could get is to be able to spend more time with him. Well, I am grateful for the times we do have and the phone calls that come without reason.

Sheriff John, nay, Mr. Rovick, was kind enough to send a cassette of the "Birthday Cake Polka" he would sing each show to all those who sent in their names to the television station. As I woke up this morning, that silly song began to play in my head. I also remembered that as a young boy, I thought it odd that someone would have pie and birthday cake at the same event.

When asked if I felt any different today, I said to a friend, "No, just as worn out as I did yesterday."

Honestly, I am doing pretty well. Back at WW and the inches are shrinking...slow but sure. Also working out and taking care of this old husk a bit better these days. I may look like hell, but I feel a wee bit better than that.

To all the other members of Sheriff John's Lunch Brigade, Happy Birthday to You! Let's have some pie and sandwiches! And happy birthday to me. I am many "another year old today".

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

A Simple Valentine

"I love you," he said.

He thought it inadequate to tell all he had to say. He wanted to say more, tell her how deeply he cared.

But it was enough, she thought.

Well, he recited his poetry and picked up his socks. Mostly. Some of the socks went missing for weeks and she hated it when he did his own laundry because he did such small loads.

That was enough, she thought. But there were other things.

He made dinner each night. And made extra so that when he traveled, she'd have some home cooked meals. He snored, but he made good chicken marsala.

He made her laugh. A lot. He listened to his gawd-awful music much too loud and couldn't carry a tune in a large pail, but he made her laugh everyday.

He liked to feed birds and grow flowers, both of which he did for himself. He tracked dog poo into the house, but his "garden of birds" was a place of solace, peace and beauty.

He kissed her for no particular reason. And rubbed her back without being asked. Both of those were nice, real nice.

And he lowered the lid on the toilet.

Yeah, that was it. He lowered the lid after he peed. She got hot just thinkin' about it.